Why I Hired a Leadership Coach

I loved the work. It fulfilled one of my highest values - to be of service. I enjoyed the client interaction more than anything. To provide information. To help solve a problem. To celebrate their successes. All emotional highs for me.

What frustrated me the most was navigating the often tempestuous waters of leadership. It isn't easy leading people. I distinctly remember thinking "I really love my work except for the people part." It's not that I disliked those I led. In fact, many were a joy to work with. But there were those who confounded me. I couldn't understand why they remained timid in their work or didn't respond well to my leadership style. At some less than fully conscious level I was asking myself, "What's wrong with them?"

Of course, I couldn't be the problem because I'd been promoted numerous times to leadership roles with increasingly expansive oversight responsibility. 

I remember the fateful day I learned that a complaint had been lodged against me. To say the least, I was surprised and hurt. On that day, I felt as if my career track was about to be de-railed. I later learned that the complaint was related to how I was "acting" as a leader. Much to my surprise, I learned that my leadership style was viewed as aggressive and intimidating. (Perhaps if I'd been a man, my style would have been interpreted differently, but that's a different story.)

As the complaint wound it's way through the procedural channels, I decided to partner with a Leadership Coach. It was clear that, although their were other dysfunctions in the organization, I had some work to do. I had some blind spots to uncover and a self awareness muscle to strengthen. In today's vernacular, I needed to work on my Emotional Intelligence. 

Mel, my Leadership Coach, did these four things exceptionally well:

Listen
Mel calmly and patiently listened to my story. She (yes Mel is a she) empathized with my situation and telegraphed hope and confidence that I could learn and grow to become a more effective leader.

Ask Questions
Mel skillfully asked questions that created "aha" moments for me. She knew that carefully crafted questions were a means for me to uncover the hidden assumptions I was working from. And once uncovered, those assumptions could either be challenged or reframed.  I recall describing a particularly difficult leadership situation and she calmly and non-judgmentally asking, "What were you thinking?" 

Hold Space
As an experienced coach, Mel knew that growing into the leader I wanted to become would take time and practice. With her presence and her pauses, she allowed me to experiment with news ways of thinking and feeling.

Hold Me Accountable
Our coaching sessions always ended with an action item. Something that I chose to commit to doing. Something that moved me closer to my goal. Sometimes it was an exercise; sometimes a task or experiment (something new to try). At our next session, we'd talk about how it went; what I'd learned; and if I hadn't done it, what got in the way.

My experience with Mel was life changing. Our work together brought me a new sense of awareness about how my thoughts and assumptions could lead to less than desirable actions and ways of being as a leader. I now understand how critical it is for a leader to do their own work in order to lead effectively. 

Because of my experience with Mel, I decided to leave the organization I was with and train to become a leadership coach. Over the last 10 years I've had the privilege to partner with leaders in the non-profit, public, small business and corporate sectors to help them answer the question "How Do I Become a Better Leader?" 

I now focus on working with non-profit and service sector leaders and their teams. Those who have multiple constituencies to lead. Those who are passionate about their work, but maybe not so adept at people part (like I was). 

If that's you, I invite you to explore my work around Passionate Leadership and the Six Pillars of Passionate Leadership.

Passionate Leadership is about harnessing positive energy for both Purpose and People in order to generate the Power for Maximum Impact.

Here's a link to download the The Power of Passionate Leadership model:  PL Model

The Six Pillars of Passionate Leadership, when forged and strengthened, become the foundation to support your leadership of those who help fulfill your team or organization's mission. The six pillars are:

1.  Deep Appreciation for Self and Others 
2.  Positive Growth Mindset
3.  Dynamic Vision Focus
4.  Embodied Trust
5.  Inspired Action
6.  Celebrated Results

Here's a link to download the Six Pillars: 6 Pillars of PL

If you're asking yourself "How Can I Be a Better Leader?". I'd love to have a conversation with you. There's no cost and lots of value. 

Passionate Leadership
is who you're being as you're leading.

About the Author

Gayle Ely is a Leadership Coach, Trainer and Facilitator and founder of Total Life Leadership. At Total Life Leadership, we partner with purpose-driven non-profit leaders and service entrepreneurs to help them answer the question “How Do I Become a Better Leader?”

Using The Six Pillars of Passionate Leadership, we equip leaders to be the best they can be.  The result is a passionate leader whose team and organization are operating for maximum impact.

Explore what’s getting in the way of passion in your leadership. Schedule an exploratory conversation. There is no cost and lots of value.

Schedule your complimentary conversation here.

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View The Six Pillars of Passionate Leadership here.
View The Power of Passionate Leadership Model here.